Bamboo & Bicycles

So this next part of our journey takes us to Yangshuo. After flying into Guilin we then bussed it 2 hours up the road and made it to our lovely little river front hotel.

There are no words to describe the beauty of this place. A series of limestone mounds/peaks protecting the paddy fields which edge the Li River, where the mist gently clings to the tops creating a magical atmosphere.

We are here for 4 days in total so a real chance to relax and drink in the traveller vibe. It's a top spot for travellers but it being winter means that it's quiet and chilled here. That said it still has a true Chinese buzz in the evenings and a market always draws a crowd.

Our first night got us orientated and before dinner Luke and I had full body massages and reflexology. They were about as much pain as you can take but try are super fast to find problem areas ad they really work on them so the outcome is actually a lot of relief. I woke up the next day to lots of bruises over my back and kidneys but felt amazing.

Friday saw us hiring bikes with a guide that took us about 1 hour upstream. From there a tractor took our bikes and we got on the traditional bamboo rafts along the river. It took about an hour and a half to go downstream and got sung traditional songs and had our photo taken at every mini water drop we had to negotiate. There was one particularly steep drop which nearly sunk myself and Brad with our paddle man shouting "wet bum wet bum" in Chinese and making monkey noises cos he seriously thought we were a gonna. He wasn't wrong on the wet bums ..and feet and legs.

We met our bikes downstream and rode back to Yangshuo. Then dinner and drinks followed by 4 head massages before bed. Brad and Luke got more than they bargained for with their 30 minutes tho (nothing dodgy).

The next day we had a lie in followed by a trip to the Golden Cave which is the Chinese version of Wookey Hole but slightly more spectacular. Our guide was hilarious because she had only been learning english for 3 months and likened every stalagmite or stalagtite to an animal or an ear or a booby. After 20 minutes of walking through this cave we got to the mud bath where we promptly stripped off and jumped it. It was freezing! Nothing like being 25 metres underground and covered in mud to go in the random life experiences folder. After the mud was the hot spring which was a little further down (and still in the cave) where we wiled a few hours away splashing around. Very relaxing and all had skin like a babbas bum.

Then it was early dinner and off to the "impressions" show on the river. There are no words to describe this show. It is on the banks of the river and has over 800 performers and is against the most breathtaking backdrop ever. There is something about the darkness, the water the mountains and the music in combination which literally takes your breath away and gives you goosies. No video or picture can do it justice really.

Then today we were up early to make the most of our last day in Yangshuo. Luke wanted to porter around so the 3 amigos headed off to the mountains, me on a moped and the others on bikes. We just pootled about all day down mud tracks, through ancient villages, undulating through the mounds and paddy fields along the river, only stopping to take photos or peek around the odd temple. A really fantastic day seeing some of the most beautiful scenery on earth, really uplifting and pretty.

As I write this we are on the bus heading back to Guilin where we get on the train at 9pm. This is going to be a rather interesting 48 hours as we didn't get the tickets we wanted so we are in 3 high bunks in cattle class. Plus Luke swears he either has lung cancer from the pollution or man flu. Either way we are lucky he is still with us, it was touch and go this morning but it would seem a few pots of ginger tea have enabled him to battle on. Luke is also timing everything he eats from here on in as he has got himself worked up about having a poo on the train. You may have noticed a theme with Luke and his toilet habits.

Next stop after the train is the Yangtze River, 3 gorges river dam and no wifi so updates between now and Shanghai might be limited.

Shining Stones, Mercury and Lady Szhar Szhar

So Wednesday was an epic day, most of which will forever be burned on my memory under the "awesome" folder.

Off we trundled with the cutesy tour guide you have ever seen, Lady Szhar Szhar who was a little china lady with a wicked sense of humour. She took an enormous shine to our Brad (along with most of the other women in china it would seem) and filled our heads with everything we need to know about emperor Qin Shi Huang.

I won't bore you with the details on here but he was the same dude that unified China, built the Great Wall, Terracotta Army and the worlds largest mausoleum, which, according to lady Szhar Szhar is fooul of shyknee stones, mercury and cwoss bo which kwill you if open. The Chinese think he's great for doing all of this, we are all horrified at the amount of people who die achieving all of these things.

After a very educational and slightly mind blowing day there (you keep saying to yourself - I'm looking at the Terracotta Army WOW), we headed back into Xi'an and to the Muslim Quarter. I must say I really like this place. It is insanely busy but has a real buzz about it. The Muslim quarter is a walled old town about 2500 years old with a giant Asian style mosque which is a pagoda with a mosquey bit on it. Surrounding the mosque and going out as far as the corners of the walls is a massive street Market which sells literally anything and everything. The old town walls are 30 metres high and 18 wide so you can ride bikes around the top and look in. It really is quite special. We did a spot of shopping there and then headed back to the hostel for late dinner and early night as we had to be up at 4.30am to catch our flight to Guilin.

Other major news of the day was that Luke managed to stay awake ALL day. I don't expect it to last!

A sleepy little village called Xi'an

Ok so Xi'an may be one of the oldest cities in China, but sleepy little village it is not. This is "real" China. Literally millions of people concentrated into one fast moving madness. When you step off the airport bus it can seem a little overwhelming but the people are not intimidating and you never feel unsafe.

They stare out of curiosity but actually in the main, a westerner is not so much of a novelty anymore and most people just crack on and leave you to it. The hostel here is super cool and we arrived right in the middle of Christmas Dinner there. It was very festive and there were lots of dancing Americans gandering around reception area.

After a quick bag drop we headed straight out to the Tang Dynasty "Broadway" show and meal. Basically this was a dumpling fest with 28 different kinds of dumpling bought to you continuously for an hour and a half at a table next to a stage. Getting there was a near death Experience. Our "taxi" was a 3 wheeled moped with a corned beef can shaped cab on the back held together with gaffer tape and bike clips and there were no rules for getting around. We went the wrong way up the road, on the pavement, through red lights and whatever other way took the drivers fancy.

After eating there was an hour long show which went through the traditional dances, music and costumes of the Tang Dynasty. Luke was so overwhelmed he fell into a coma and Brad found a story on the BBC world app regarding the Italian Prime Minister more interesting, but Dani and I tried our best to look artsy and tried to appreciate the culture. An hour was enough though, only so much xylophone and cymbal clashing you can listen to and all I could think about was how those long sleeves would get filthy and would really annoy me. How can you do the washing up in those? No chance.

Ottono more

Ok so we didnt make it to Ottos. Turns out it was shut for a refurb so we had to settle for a local restaurant where they specialised in BBQ anything, including frogs, scorpions, snakes and locusts. We stuck to chicken and shrimp and had a Aussie med student tag along as he was alone for the night. Had a great time getting to know each other with a good dinner and back to our little cafe bar haunt for Ho Cho and an Irish coffee. Owner gave Dani and I teddy bears for Christmas so we must have spent a decent amount of money there during our time in Beijing!

Back at the hostel, Father Christmas had been removed but we are not sure if it was sabotage or deliberate.... Who can say.

Up early and off to the airport for our two hour flight to Xi'an which is smogsville. Dad if you are reading this it is totally an episode of Megastructures meets how it's made meets growth on an indescribably massive and fast scale. The flight was good. Food choice was fermented egg and beef noodles and the in flight entertainment was Shaun the sheep. Well happy with that.

Not sure what there is to do here other than the Terracotta Army, but it turns out 10 million people live here so there must be shops. Rumour has it there is an ancient Muslim quarter with a bell tower, mosque and unique market so we will try and find that this afternoon. Turns out airport taxi drivers are *bleeps* the world over so we've opted for buses and trains as a matter of principle. We'll not be ripped off by anyone even if it is only for the sake of £3! Haha spot the odd one out!

Walls, Steps, Hills, Palaces, Walls, Steps, Hills, Palaces

So it's been a fairly epic 4 days in the grand old land of Beijing. You hear a lot of things about China before you go.... But Beijing is a wonderful mix of mystical ancient history and super modern advanced westernisation and not a lot in the middle. A city of contrasts for sure. Very safe, very clean, MASSIVE beyond comprehension but actually very calm and organised and everyone's just happy getting on and doing their thing.

6am Sunday, we took a 4 hour car journey to the Huxbei Provence (which borders with Mongolia) and to the Jingshanling area of the Great Wall. Luke is not a morning person and hasn't yet woken up this holiday. They must work him hard because I think he is catching up. This area is the most remote area that tourists can access and as soon as you get there you can see that most of people selling things or offering to be guides are Mongolian and look quite different to the Chinese people. They also have amazing fitness levels as I have never seen people run up 150 steps so quickly to try and offer someone chopsticks or 10p postcards.

Anyway Mongolians aside it is safe to say that this is an absolutely stunningly beautiful mountainous region which is a hard hike but extremely rewarding. The section of the wall is named after the regiment/area of soldiers that built it and the hike consisted of 18 towers. Most are separated by steep stairs or paved sections which were treacherous because of the amount of snow and ice up there. It's safe to say health and safety is not top of their list but actually in the name of conservation it's understandable why it's left untouched. This particular section is around 600 years old and mostly unrestored. Only the first 3 towers were restored in the 80's, the rest are In their original state. It was completely exhausting, hard work and a mental test to do (I had to have a good chat with myself when faced with another set of 110 Ice and snow covered steps) but getting to the highest point of the wall was well worth it. How the soldiers did it day in and day out is unbelievable, they must have been machines!

Today we got up fairly early and headed North West of Beijing to the Summer Palace. It is stunning beyond words and actually more beautiful and interesting than the Forbidden City. The whole lake around which the palace was built was completely frozen over with people walking on it and somehow that combined with the light mist covering Beijing added a magical touch to the place.

Then after a quick lunch stop headed over to the Forbidden City and Mao's Mausoleum. Safe to say once you've seen one temple/palace you've seen them all. What is interesting is the history of the people and Dynasty's and what each one did. Saw some pretty ancient vases and pots going back to 200bc but perfectly preserved.

Last night in Beijing tonight so having a slap Up meal at Otto's before getting up early and heading over to the airport to catch our flight to Xi'an. To be perfectly honest I don't think I can last much longer in this hostel down to the pure and simple fact that the signing father Christmassy in the courtyard has a sensor which goes off everytime someone walks past (which is about every 10 seconds)

36 mad hours later...

Well what can I say... A relatively easy journey hear which was smooth running save for Luke having a tantrum about not being able to have a poo in Zurich airport and realising that the brace position was only invented to allow a rush of blood and oxygen to the brain to make you calm in the moments just before your death! Hahahaha anyway we landed in Beijing at 5.15am and the gorgeous Brad was there waiting for us having arrived a few hours prior to us. We got straight into a taxi to our hostel and found ourselves roaming the Forbidden City and Tianaman Square all before 9am.

It was FREEZING cold with a nasty Siberian wind so we then decided to brave the Beijing subway and headed over to the Temple of Heaven. This was located it what can only be described as a party park, where lots of people were dancing around to whatever the hell they liked. The temple itself was beautiful and so was the park if not a bit of a long walk.

After an authentic Chinese Lunch which consisted of fairly normal animals and identifiable vegetables (wasn't fussed on the tofu), we negotiated the famous Pearl Market and then jumped back on the tube to the Olympic Park where we saw the famous Bird Nest Stadium and bubble wrap aqua centre. At this point after 36 hours with no sleep, Luke's one eye involuntarily closed itself and he almost lost the will to live. It was safe to say he was no longer enjoying himself. A taxi ride and a short nap in the car later we find ourselves back in our rooms chilling out for a few hours before heading out to the famous Silk Road and to eat some Beijing Duck.

Early night tonight as lots of sleep to catch up on plus a 6.20am pick up for our little expedition to the Great Wall of China.

A very exciting first few hours :)

One day to goooo!

Preparations are finalised, packing is almost finished and all that separates us and an awesome time is the small matter of a 14 hour flight.

Brad is sat on a pile of cash in an empty flat eagerly awaiting our arrival, without even an electric scooter to keep him occupied.

Everyone seems to have words of wisdom on the food front. I am now slightly worried but not as worried as Luke who has aptly renamed himself Karl after the renowned explorer Karl Pilkington. After the news of our "standard class" train tickets, we really will be having the full Idiot Abroad experience.

Good bye Wales and Nihow China!

2 weeks to go!!

It is safe to say I am insanely excited..not least by our recent adjustments to the schedule.

It is truly building up to be the trip of a lifetime...14 days and counting!!